Today is prayer day.
It is the day I look forward to all week.
There was a time in the not so distant past that I didn't want to go. First of all, my illness whacked me out so bad that I had to make myself leave the house and when I did there was a good chance that I would have a panic attack. Secondly, I was gone for so long that going back to prayer was difficult. Lastly, and I am not sure how to explain this, but my view changed a bit while living down south.
My faith view.
Things that I use to feel were important are no longer important. My prayer is for a deepening relationship with Him. To be willing to do what He asks me to do even if it hurts. (And many times it has!) My prayer is that my family will keep Jesus first in their lives. That we will have the courage to reach out to those who need us. My comfort is no longer important. My image is not worth a hill of beans if I am not putting others first. I have to let my pride go by the wayside.
I know you may think, well duh...this should have been my view all along. And it was, but in a selfish way. I wanted God to take notice of what I was doing for Him. To answer my, oh so spiritual prayers. To make my family and I successful and then we could do amazing things for Him. To walk in wealth and health and spiritual maturity.
God's faithfulness...He wouldn't let me stay that way. He won't let any of us stay that way. He craves a deeper relationship with us. He desires for us to look to Him for everything. He wants us to grow in the Word. He wants true prayer and communion with Him. He wants our fellowship to be pure. He loves us.
I get to go to prayer and I have a new faith view.
**My friend Cindy at Letters from Midlife is doing a give away. They are beautiful handmade note cards she made herself. Go check it out.
4 comments:
This post actually brought tears to my eyes. I'm in a similar place where prayer and my relationship with the Father is deepening to the point that other things just don't seem so important anymore. Thank you for sharing your heart in such a personal an eloquent way that reflects the Lord.
Gina,
Thank you so much for your comment on my blog. I think we have something in common. I have suffered from PA'S myself. How old is your son? I love your blog!
I love this post! Isn't it just so true that when we truly strive to place Him first, other things get so small on our radar. Oh, that we maintain this. Thanks for this today....
You are a blessing! Thanks for your transparent encouragement...
and I rememebered asaph had 2 kathy's
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